After letting the dust settle a few days, two things are clear:

1) Rebecca, Kenny and Brianna cannot come to live with me in Texas.

2) My family wants all of us to be together.

There's little left to say. Rebbie & I have discussed every alternative, but it all comes back to these points. We all want to be together as a family, and if Muhammad cannot come to the mountain, then the mountain must come to Muhammad. That's to say that I'm putting plans in place to move to Kansas.

I'm scared and concerned; there's absolutely no way I can find a job in Kansas where I'll be able to realize the earning potential that I've found in Austin, but that doesn't matter anymore. Rebecca's friend, Colette, put everything into perspective for me in a late night call a few evenings back. Rebbie, Kenny & Bri need me, but they're not going to say so. They want this to be my decison.

And thus, it's been made.

I don't want to be away from them any longer. We've been apart for too long as it is, hoping and believing that a better outcome would be ruled by the court, but things just didn't go our way.

I think I can make an "okay" living in Kansas CIty, not that I'll ever be able to make the income I can here in Austin. After all, there are only three hi-tech hubs in the U.S., and neither Topeka nor Kansas City are among them. My income there won't compare to what I can earn in Austin, so I won't be able to provide for Rebbie, Kenny & Bri as well as I could otherwise. The family budget will be tight, but money isn't everything. Family is, and they want me there with them. There's nothing more important than that.

That said, I'll just share that when Rebbie and I came to the decision that I'd move to Kansas, and that we'd get a home for the four of us, I heard the kids cheer in the background. That was cool. To hear their excitement was more than enough for me to know we'd made the right decision.

All said, even though it's not what we all had hoped for - or what we believe (even now) is really best for K & B - it's good enough for now. We'll make it work.

Just returned home. Things went badly for us. The court ruled that Kenny & Brianna must remain in Topeka. As long as Rebbie remains there, too, she will retain custody. If she moves away, their residential custodies go to their respecitve dads. Of course, Rebbie would never leave Topeka wthout Kenny or Bri, nor would I want (or expect) her to do that. The dads know this, too, and probably was elemental in their plans.

We told K & B (along with Grandma, Graddad & Unca' Dan) the outcome Monday evening. Rebbie & I were pretty emotional about it. The kids were visibly upset.

We're all very disappointed and saddened. I couldn't sleep at all, and had to fly back very early this morning. At noon Rebbie called to tell me that the kids were both so unhappy this morning that they have tummy-aches, and stayed home from school today. Mom & I aren't feeling much better.

We have some decisions ahead of us we'll have to make, but we're going to let things settle a bit so we have clearer heads.

This time, it seems that the legal system let us all down.

Rebbie called me during the lunch hour today with some good news. Kenny was just named to the principal's honor roll at his school. Kenny has dramatically pulled up his grades from where they were a few months ago. She and I are very proud of Kenny and his hard work.

Rebbie was also recognized today by her workers and the management. She was given a certificate of recognition, some flowers and the rest of the day off! Gotta love getting PTO!

I've been getting a lot of feedback from family and friends about the new website, all positive. Some have suggested more photos or movies, so I'll see what can be done to accommodate everyone.

In celebration of Easter and remembering that Christ rose from his tomb after dying for us all, today I'm re-launching my family website, replacing the old stale and stagnant website that has remain largely unchanged for the past several years.

Well, tomorrow I'll be on my way to Topeka to see Rebbie, Kenny & Brianna. I can hardly wait. I haven't seen them since Christmas. I'll be taking off around 4 a.m. in the wee hours. It's a nine to ten hour drive, depending on traffic (and how heavy my foot gets), so I should be there between 1 p.m. and 2 p.m.

Rebbie & I have our first hearings in custody court for the kids on March 2nd. Wish we didn't have to go thru all of this because all that's happening because Rebbie & I believe that bringing them to Texas so we can all be a family together is the best thing for them. It's time they had some stability and a real family environment. In the end, Rebbie & I know that, ultimately, it's going to happen any way; but with the kids dads trying to block every turn, it's taking a toll on the kids.

Kenny & Brianna often tell me how much they wish they were already here. I wonder why the dads aren't listening if they are truly interested in what's best for Kenny & Bri. I guess the only way to prove that they want to move here is to work with the court and get the guardians ad litem appointed to them next week.